Random Blah Blah

Today is just going to be a random day of whatever I have saved up my sleeve.  I'm sleepy and hyper all at the same time....don't ask, cause I don't know what that means really.  It's just how I feel.  

I feel like I'm on crack today....Just this kind though....

Dazzle and Neon start school tomorrow.  **SIGH**  They're excited but I'm not really.  That means I have to get up a whole hour I'm gonna die earlier.  They are both riding the school bus home this year and I am nervous about that.  Even though they will both be armed with cell phones and house keys...I'm still nervous.  When I was in school, our bus driver was an old, black man (who happened to be the wood working teacher) and he smoked a fucking cigar while he drove the bus the big fat stinky kind mind you and when he wanted you to sit down, he just slammed on the breaks so you would fall down.  Not good.  There was also fist fighting and spitting, older siblings beating the fuck out of their little siblings and the general bad stuff.  I swear, I WILL be the bitch mother that is up at the school every single day raising holy hell if Dazzle and Neon have problems.  That bus driver does not want anything to happen to my children if he/she wants to stay alive.  I am so not playing!


They damn well better look THIS HAPPY.  Just not this over crowded. 

On a totally different note (check the title, it says "RANDOM") Lolly found this joke somewhere and it's so funny....I just had to share:

Dad buys a lie detector robot which slaps people when they lie. He decides to test it at dinner. “Son,  where were you today?” The son says “at school dad.” Robot slaps the son! “Ok, I watched a dvd at my friend’s house!” “What dvd?” “Toy Story.” Robot slaps the son again! “Ok, it was a porno” cries the son.  “What! When I was your age I didn’t know what porn was” says the dad. Robot slaps the dad! Mom laughs “Hahaha! He’s certainly your son.” Robot slaps the mom!!!!!!

You liked that!  Admit it!  Thanks again for that, Lolly, I loved it!

And how about those urinals for women?  Kitti found that somewhere online one day and we were like WTF?!  Don't put it past me.  I'll try anything, once!



Yep, it looks like this.  OMG, really?  Well, why shouldn't we get to pee standing up too??  This looks like "Pop a squat" has reached a whole new level.



Possibly coming to a restroom near you?

Kitti also found some of the coolest dog leashes I have ever seen on the internet the other day and I thought it would be fun to share them.  I honestly want a couple of them.  

HA!  Let's see you walk your dog without him eating his own leash!  FUNNY!





Don’t let all of Fido’s excess energy go to waste, get the Power-Generating Dog Leash, and put your dog to work. As your dog pulls on the leash, it generates power to charge a LED flashlight to brighten up your evening walk.  I want this one! 



I can imagine this one freaking people out left to right...so naturally I really want one!!!!  LOL!  Poor dog looking all held up!  HAHAHAHA!  Don't you even think about popping a squat here or I'll put a cap in your ass!  HA!

Once again thank you Kitti.  She has to get props for this next photo cause she sure found it!  If you are walking around your neighborhood and you see this...please let me know...because that is a neighborhood that I would like to live in.  Whoever came up with this poster is my fucking hero.



OMG, I fucking love this!  I want one to hang up in my bedroom!  Creative fuckers!


That's all for today folks.  I have to get work done!  I can't sit here and get paid to fool around on the internet all day. or can I?

This is me...like every single day!  Internet, you're such a selfish bitch!!